Wordless Wednesday

I get it....

Thanks to a (ahem) gentle reminder from a friend or two this weekend, I am renewing a committment to posting here. You know, it's not that I actually haven't had time, I can always make time, 'cuz who needs sleep? It's just that some days, I think it's pretty status quo around here and there's nothing profound or share worthy to write about.

So what's been going on?...
I had a lovely visit with a boy I am head over heels about. His name is Vernon and he came all the way from Denmark to meet me. He is fantastic - long legs, beautiful smooth skin, luscious little lips and a baby fresh smelling head! I can't wait to watch this little guy grow and it was so much fun to see how in love his momma and dad are with him too!

Captain Fearbeard turned 6! Yep, the last of the 5 year olds have come and gone in this house - bittersweet. He's fully into those size 7 clothes we got, riding a 20 inch bike and wearing a size 2.5 shoe. There is not a stitch of that chubby, bald baby in sight anymore. We had a Friday night party with fabulous weather. I say a birthday party with a pirate theme and swords with only one child bleeding is a pretty swell success!!

Football season is in full swing. While I can't even come close to winning at my football picks each week, I picked a pretty great Red Dragon team to root for! It's been really cool to watch how much these boys who have played together for 4 years are really starting to come into the game and play wisely. Wy's loving it, as usual.

The Zambians are here! I was encouraged to see people picking up sponsorship of some of the student leaders at the college and we had the opportunity to start ours up too. We had a great time hanging with them on Sunday and Monday. Can't wait to see them again in October and give them a bunch of snaps to take home. I'll post more about their visit to the school when I've got pictures to accompany because my words can't do it justice. It was amazing, reciprocally amazing.

Overheard at our house:
Piper: "I have a boyfriend now, but today he got expelled from school. If he ever gets to come back, I'm totally telling him I'm breaking up with him."

That boy!

Oh, that boy! He's got charm. He's got wit. He's got faith. He's got the softest heart. I am so thankful that he walks his talk. What a stand up guy. Oh Lord, I pray that You continue to grow this attribute in him and that you would use him to better teach it to the rest of us!

Example? His teacher's known him for 2 weeks and is singing his praises. She shared this with me during email correspondence last week:
"I also wanted to let you know how THRILLED I am to have Wyatt in class. He is by far one of the neatest and kindest children I have ever had the opportunity to teach. I feel like I have learned so much from him already. I have to share a sweet "Wyatt Story"... After giving their speeches for class president Wyatt congratulated the other little girl that spoke. He told her that she did a great job and that he was going to vote for her. In our class of 24, she received 2 votes... I just believe hers and Wyatt's. There are thousands moments like this one where Wyatt's kind heart shines through and I just feel so honored that I get to work with him this year!"

Overheard at our house this week:
Ryder - "You don't need balance. You just need awesomeness."

Funklessness

So it's been just shy of a month since I last posted - why? A funk, plain and simple. But I'm happy to announce I'm pretty much funkless. There have been many weights on my shoulders since June - Zambia, jobs, finances, parenting, health, houses. And while they're not lifted, I'm sharing the load and asking others for prayer support - those of you who know who you are, I thank you and covet this.

My most recent parenting conundrum: In July, I got a call from the director of Camp Michindoh about Sis. He said that both of her implants weren't working and he didn't know what to do. Ugh. Trouble shooting over the phone from 6 hours away with someone who didn't even know what a cochlear implant was before meeting Sis! They were writing messages on paper to communicate with her since they didn't know sign.

Through some trial and error, I figured out that the first problem was that the ear hooks were on the wrong implant. Since each implant only "talks" with a specific internal device, they can't be mixed up. We switched and got the left one working. In the mean time, it came to light that the right one was actually broken, as in more pieces than it left our house in. Once that one was working, she said she was willing to try to stay the last 3 days of camp, using just the left side. Her left side is so much weaker that I wondered if she would make it through, but she did!

When she got home and I got a real look at the right side processor and some much needed conversation with her, the real story came to light. It wasn't just it "broke", it got thrown! It seems she was having a bad hair day and was frustrated so she took it off and threw it onto the concrete floor in her cabin. Yikes! Concrete and plastic housing to a ear level computer processing is not a jolly combination. It's really broken.

The full cost for replacement and mapping of her processor is about $5800. I was stuck with how to teach her the full extent of her actions. Even being a very bright10 years old, can she really grasp how much money that is?!? How do I teach this child to better vent her anger and frustration? She faces more of it on a daily level with simple communication breakdown than we can imagine. How much of this do I chalk up to her being "different"? How much is okay to "get by with" for that reason? None? Some? Most? I've spent 10 years telling her she can do everything that anyone else does, but can she truly? There's not much more that can make you feel like you are failing as a parent than to have no ideas on how to help your child cope.

We are fighting with the insurance company at present to help with the replacement/repair costs, which they are denying due to it being a non-medical necessity. Even if they do approve, it won't be the full amount, but any amount is a help. And Sis is working odd jobs for $5/hour to help pay for some of the costs - icky jobs like pulling weeds, cleaning up after animals, scraping paint. Any money she earns, she puts into an envelope to help defer costs. Beyond that, I'm at a loss as to a long term action plan to help her. Does it always just have to be one day at a time? Oh, how I love a good plan, but right now I guess it does.

Wordless Wednesday

Wordful Wednesday

I wish I knew how to enact long term balance. I think I'm really good at balancing for a while, and then there comes a point when I end up overwhelmed. From there I end up grumpy and somewhat resentful that I'm so worried, tired, overbooked and overwhelmed. Then I end up enacting measures to save the world from me and my bad attitude, which can be equally as stressful and tiring, but more often lonely! Sigh.

I'm just working through my return from Africa when my body decides to take a dump on me, a windshield breaks, a rear car hatch breaks, a cochlear implant breaks, a child has more medical procedures, an air conditioning unit breaks, a job opportunity goes sour, family hurts. I feel like Sisyphus. This is my life, like a skipping record (for those of you too young to remember records, I apologize, but feel strangely sorry for you too!).

I'm not questioning trials (maybe I'm just not rejoicing in them enough?) but come on - doesn't there seriously have to be a break sometime? Truly God has a point here, but after 12 years, it would seem He would have made it by now! I want to scream at Him to show me what I'm missing in all this - I must be an Israelite in modern skin because I just don't get it! I'm fairly certain the feeling of frustration is mutual between God & I.

Wordless Wednesday