My most recent parenting conundrum: In July, I got a call from the director of Camp Michindoh about Sis. He said that both of her implants weren't working and he didn't know what to do. Ugh. Trouble shooting over the phone from 6 hours away with someone who didn't even know what a cochlear implant was before meeting Sis! They were writing messages on paper to communicate with her since they didn't know sign.
Through some trial and error, I figured out that the first problem was that the ear hooks were on the wrong implant. Since each implant only "talks" with a specific internal device, they can't be mixed up. We switched and got the left one working. In the mean time, it came to light that the right one was actually broken, as in more pieces than it left our house in. Once that one was working, she said she was willing to try to stay the last 3 days of camp, using just the left side. Her left side is so much weaker that I wondered if she would make it through, but she did!
When she got home and I got a real look at the right side processor and some much needed conversation with her, the real story came to light. It wasn't just it "broke", it got thrown! It seems she was having a bad hair day and was frustrated so she took it off and threw it onto the concrete floor in her cabin. Yikes! Concrete and plastic housing to a ear level computer processing is not a jolly combination. It's really broken.
The full cost for replacement and mapping of her processor is about $5800. I was stuck with how to teach her the full extent of her actions. Even being a very bright10 years old, can she really grasp how much money that is?!? How do I teach this child to better vent her anger and frustration? She faces more of it on a daily level with simple communication breakdown than we can imagine. How much of this do I chalk up to her being "different"? How much is okay to "get by with" for that reason? None? Some? Most? I've spent 10 years telling her she can do everything that anyone else does, but can she truly? There's not much more that can make you feel like you are failing as a parent than to have no ideas on how to help your child cope.
We are fighting with the insurance company at present to help with the replacement/repair costs, which they are denying due to it being a non-medical necessity. Even if they do approve, it won't be the full amount, but any amount is a help. And Sis is working odd jobs for $5/hour to help pay for some of the costs - icky jobs like pulling weeds, cleaning up after animals, scraping paint. Any money she earns, she puts into an envelope to help defer costs. Beyond that, I'm at a loss as to a long term action plan to help her. Does it always just have to be one day at a time? Oh, how I love a good plan, but right now I guess it does.
