Monday, March 31, 2014

starting again

I was working out very regularly to lose 10 pounds 2 years ago. I've been successful in keeping it off, but now 6 pounds crept on since Christmas and clothes aren't quite fitting. Just eating smartly doesn't seem to be cutting it for me to maintain anymore. 

So, since I was up at 3:35am again (and, yes, I realize that gives me enough time to do 60-90 minutes of working out, but I don't really have the desire to do that!) and falling back to sleep wasn't happening, I decided today was the day to start. T25, Shaun T, and I met this morning. We got along for the first 15 minutes, but then I had to hang out solely with Tania for the last 10 minutes because I was sucking wind. 

Motivated though, so I'll pick it up again tomorrow. Hopefully a little closer to 5am, though.



Thursday, March 6, 2014

My Courageous Child

My child has courage. She has told me about some of her experiences at school - no small feat, considering how humiliating it can be for kids to tell their parents about the goings on among their peers, but I'm sure I only know of the tip of the iceberg. Together, we have tried everything I can think of to manage the problem on our own. We've prayed. We've ignored. We've avoided. We've tried to use humor to deflect. We've encouraged journaling. We've talked. We've seen counselors. What else to do? 

We've now passed the point of "Is my child being overly sensitive?", "I am only getting one side of the story.", and "Jr. High is a tough age." I've seen it with my own eyes. Other parents have witnessed it. My child continues to report it happening. I'm officially stepping across the line and saying my child is being bullied. I've had enough. I will NOT be that parent, crying and saying "I didn't realize it was that bad."

What does bullying look like? For our family, it looks like this: purposeful exclusion, name calling, cruel texts, "accidental" bumping and snickering in the halls, and now, threats of physical harm (yesterday's text: "STFU. Someone's getting hurt - you.")


Straight up threatening has taken this to a whole new height for me and, while my child has made known to her teachers some of the incidents, to my knowledge, the school has yet to formally step in and address it. Is it a lack of awareness? Is it a lack of concern? Is it a lack of knowledge on how to handle the situation? This cannot be handled as a "kids will be kids" mentality. It is not a tolerable, childhood rite of passage. When that happens, adults violate a child's trust and renounce their role as a responsible adult.


Gone are the days of Scut Farkus jumping out from behind a fence and demanding you "Say Uncle!" Now bullies are often the average, solid students that rule the school below the radar of the teachers and administration. They use relational aggression to hurt and humiliate, and seemingly, are just as skilled at manipulating the adults around them.


It's time for me to be my child's champion. I'm taking solid, purposeful, documented steps. I'm going to administration, and if need be, to the school board and to the authorities. I'm going to show her that she deserves better; she deserves to be heard; her self-worth is not dependent on what these other children think. I will not do nothing. I love her too much.